Robin Round #1

PaperArtist_2013-06-30_13-50-42Ridley: A Robin Round actually stems from maths class in secondary school. My teacher used to do ‘Robin Rounds’, he’d skip around the class and fire out hard questions at individual students, giving only seconds for the person to try work it out before he’d shout, ‘next!’. Very rarely did anyone ever get it right when they were the first person asked. I did once, there was an impressed stir throughout the room, I had to duck my head though, knowing full well if anyone really looked at me they’d see my mouth hanging open in surprise and be able to tell I’d just guessed the answer! 🙂

Anywho, the whole point of these quick fire Robin Round (sounds dangerous, ja? It surely, isn’t…) this time is to have a little bit of fun, to scatter a few information crumbs about us (if anyone cares!) and for us to get to know anyone that may be out there and cares to share.*points at you*

I’ve numbered this post, so I’m presuming I’ve the intention of doing more than one of these… do I, Brain? (‘I don’t know Pinky, do you? Never mind though, now it’s time to try take over the world!’…..sometimes I’m ashamed of myself….but not today! 🙂 Pinky and the Brain, if you’ve never watched them, your life is just not complete! Get thee to youtube peeps.)

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SO….Latimer……..we’ll start off slowly….

1. Favourite time of the day?

Latimer: 6pm, the day is more or less over and I know that I can look forward to relaxing 🙂

2. What was your last dream about?

Latimer: I was cycling along the motorway, trying to get home, and fell asleep on the side of the road. When I woke up someone was stealing my bike! What the Dickens?! “Come back with my bike thief!”

3. I have a puffalump, what do you think it is? (I don’t think I’ve ever shown you…and no, it’s not a disease or injury. Don’t google it!)

Latimer: It sounds like what a child might call a boil… hmm, I’m going to say some sort of soft toy… now I look it up… And so it is… They had a name? I think I used to have coats made out of that material when I was in primary school! 

4. If you had all the time and money in the world, where would you be and what would you be doing?

Latimer: Travelling the world and writing – 🙂

5. One of the best things (helpful, inspirational, funny) that someone has ever said to you? (It was me of course, I’m sure…it better have been! Haha….seriously    😛  )

Latimer: Eat the elephant one bite at a time, before you know it, it will be gone! Huzzah! (basically take everything one step at a time). Also, another one; ‘everyone is afraid in the dark, wait until you turn the light on before you start to worry’; I get wound up about the unknown, but you should really wait until you know what’s going on before you start to worry!

6. The first video game you ever played was? And your favourite game now is?

Latimer: my first game was this really, really REALLY old game; it was on an old ass computer, we are talking very pixelated. The game was 2D; think old fashioned snake:It was a box and you had to ‘herd’ a single elephant into the box. I was probably only three or four playing it.

In childhood I used to play a game called Toejam and Earl 2… haha, that game was weirdly brilliant. You played two aliens trying to protect their planet (called Funk-o-tron!) from these humans that had invaded it… You had to trap the humans in jars by.. well pelting them with jars… it was really weird!

My favourite game now… hmm, Kingdom Hearts (I fecking love that series!! SOORA!!)

(Disney and Square Enix… jaysus I died and went to heaven!!)

7. Favourite flavour?

Latimer: RED! Haha. You know me!

8. What actor would you most like to….meet? 🙂

Latimer: I don’t know really… that’s a hard one, while not really an answer you know I would love to go to the BAFTAs one day!

9. Where are you right now? And what’s the weirdest thing in or about the place you’re in?

Latimer: My room *turns around… what is the weirdest thing here, aside from me! mwaha* 

Well these are pretty weird…

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They are the shell from clams, or something, that me and my mam collected on an aboriginal shore walk in Cairns, AUStralia! We ate what was inside and I pocketed the shells. Yep. (Latimer= hoarder and eater of the strange) 

10. If you could send something to your future self, what would it be?

Latimer: future self… oh dear. Hmm. I would send my worries haha. Though future me would be like; ‘damn it! Why you doing that?! I got my own worries!’

11. What pops into your mind when you hear the words:

Pink- Dolls                               Glue- Art

Tree- Elves!                             Cup- Tea

Pen- Drawing!                          Puddle- Jemima Puddleduck haha

12. A portal opened right now, you didn’t know where it ended up or if you could come back, would you walk through it?

Latimer: Argh… no! I can’t take the chance, sure if I ended up in Hogwarts that’s great but if I ended up in Nightmare before Christmas Hallow’een Town I don’t know what I would do (cry… a lot)

13. What super power would you love?

Latimer: Teleportion! Do you see how I can pick a power? Ridley never plays this game right!

14. Batman, Superman or Spiderman?

Latimer: Batman; the hero that Gotham needs but doesn’t deserve… or needs right now, but doesn’t have… or something, he’s awesome!

15. Vampire vs werewolves?

Latimer: there was a time it would have been vampires, but no you have swayed me through the years Pidley… it would have to be werewolves!

16. If you had to choose between thunderstorm or snowstorm?

Latimer: Ohh, I like the after look of a snowstorm, but I pick thunderstorm… so dramatic and sitting in the dark (cos the lights usually seem to go) and seeing the lightning and hearing the thunder… oh too cool for school, yea!

17. An unusual pet hate of yours?

Latimer: People walking too slowly in front of me – is that unusual? I really hate it…

18. You’re reading a book, the one thing you’d love to find in it is?

Latimer: Characters I love. A bit quirky, or just interesting.

19. Favourite soundtrack?

Latimer: Lord of the Rings, Fellowship of the Ring

20. You’re only allowed one: films, books or music, which would you choose?

Latimer: are we talking infinite amounts here? Hmmm…Books then!

21. If you could live anywhere, where would it be?

Latimer: By the sea

Antrim coast – glorious

22. The best thing you’ve done or read or seen in the last year is?

Latimer: Publishing the book 🙂 and going to Japan again 🙂 (technically last year… hmm, well going on holidays and publishing the other book will still be this year too!!)

23. The creepiest thing ever would be…?

Latimer: Zombie Apocalypse! AHHH!!!

24. You see a camera crew filming in front of you on the street, what do you do?

Latimer: walk around it! *inches close and whispers fearfully* cameras steal your sooouuuulll!!

25. I’m sure I’ll be getting a question or two now…or maybe a new game will be a-foot! We shall see. Did you like the questions Latimer?

Latimer: That was fun… I promise a Pidley Wren Wround in the near future!

Why not share your answers to the questions above with us, we’d love to read them!!

Broken Laptop & Delirium

Ridley: Apologies for the radio silence recently, we’ve been a little absent from the blogging and twittering world. Mainly because I’m down with a cold (What’s new! I’ve the immune system of a dead person!) and Latimer is currently banned from the internet. Well…her laptop is broken. Yes, I heard the collective wince. I winced even as I typed that. I will readily admit I’m an internet addict (and a chocolate and caffeine one, we all have our vices!) so that would be hell on earth for me (and it is for her too!). You really don’t realise how often you turn on your computer until you no longer have it!

Now, you’ll have to picture her pulling out her hair and pacing furiously, while simultaneously pleading and threatening her silent blank screen. I’m just hoping the IT peoples she brought it to can recover the information on it! I’d say she’d have had to hold back the urge to not punch the IT man as he dithered over whether he could fix it. I imagine it could have gone like this, (but for the fact that she’s a nice, polite self-restrained individual):

Latimer slams in through the glass door of the shop. It’s still fairly empty, having just opened a minute and a half ago. Her feet make a scratching sound as she scurries across their grey carpet, zipping in between the aisles of empty boxes advertising anti-viral software and straight to customer service. When she reaches the white counter, a man in a yellow t-shirt has his back to her. She swings her laptop bag around and slides onto the counter top.

“Help me…please.” She whispers. “It’s broken.”

The man jumps and twists round, dropping his pen. He blinks at her sudden appearance. “Wel-welcome to the IT help desk.” He stumbles and then swoops down under the desk to pick up his biro. “How can I help you?”

Latimer frowns at him and points at the black square bag. “It’s broken. I don’t know what happened. It won’t turn on.”

“Of course, well then you’ve come to the right place. Let me take a look.” He slides the laptop out and peers at the underside of it.

“So it won’t turn on…now, you did plug it in, right?” He asks.

Latimer’s hands drop down to her sides, her fingers twitch. She narrows her eyes. “Yes.”

He nods and opens it up. “Intel pentium core processor…good…”

“Hmm hmm…” Latimer’s fingers begin to drum against her thigh.

He examines it, there’s silence for a little while. Latimer bounces on the balls of her feet.

“So…” She bites her lip. “Does it look bad, can you fix it?”

He starts mumbling to himself. ‘Well…I suppose, I could try to…but then I don’t know if that would work. Hmm…’ He scratches his head with his blue pen. Latimer’s hands curl into fists. ‘I wonder if I…’

He turns the laptop round. He jams his pen behind his ear and jabs at a few keys, frowning down in intense concentration.  Latimer leans in nodding, her eyes widen. “Yes?”

After a few moments, he draws back with a shake of his head. “No, the power button isn’t the answer anyway…”

*SMACK* Latimer throws down her laptop case.

“I’ll kill you!” She leaps over the counter and shakes the man by his collar. “Fix it! Fix it, god damnit!”

“No Latimer! It’s not worth it!”  (Some random person who happens to know her shouts-as I’m not there, but if I was, ’tis what I would say! haha.)

People haul her off of him. He’s unscathed, but the same can’t be said for her. The police are called. It all ends up with her rocking in the corner of a damp mouldy cell, giggling and muttering to herself. “Fix it…fix…fix…fix….I’ll fix it…”

Her one phone call is made to Ridley-not a good idea this time (is it ever a good idea? haha).

Ridley is at home, her flowery covers have been tugged up to her chin. She’s shivering and sweating in bed. There are empty tubes of Tyrozet throat lozenges littering the floor in amongst scrunched up tissue paper and tatty brown cardboard toilet rolls.

She’s randomly hollering out words in her delirium.

“Nurofen!”

“Batman!”

Ridley often gets up and wanders to the kitchen like a grumpy Lurch, peering in the cupboard for things to make her feel better and making endless cups of tea.

When she returns to her room, she peers around.

“Who put these little flashing lights in my room, they won’t turn off!”

Then she realises they’re in her eyes.

A distinct overpowering whiff of TCP wafts from her to join the smell of cooking chicken that’s drifting up from downstairs. Her mother is in the kitchen, she’s like a witch over a cauldron with a big wooden spoon. Churning and churning a bubbling broth in a large saucepan. She’s making Chicken Penicillin and she’s tossing in vegetables, spices, whole chicken carcasses and chanting about, “Bone marrow and antibodies!”

Ridley gladly accepts anything to relieve the misery. She really doesn’t remember when she swallowed the barbed wire that is now stuck in her throat.

As she feasts on her soup, and having taken more drowsy medication, her mobile beside her rings.

“Hello?” She whispers in a hoarse voice.

“Ridley! Help me, my laptop is broken! And I’m in jail!”

Ridley pulls back and peers at the number on the screen. She puts the phone back to her ear. “Who is this?”

“What do you mean, who is this? It’s Latimer! You need to get me out of here, I need to fix my computer!”

Ridley yawns, her tablets begin to kick in. “I don’t understand…my brain it’s not…Lat I can’t help right now, ‘m sorry…ring back later.”

“What!? No, wait…”

Ridley hangs up and immediately nods off.

When she wakes up. She begins to remember the dream, which involved chicken soup and a phone call. She shuffles downstairs, trying to recall its ending. There’s a reporter in the kitchen. There are also two scientists in white coats, huddling over the grubby silver saucepan and poking at a raw onion. 

“I’ve just won a prize!” Her mother beams. “I found the cure to the common cold!”

“Your mother’s made a massive break through.” The man at the kitchen table says with his head bent over his notepad.

“Has she.” Ridley nods to her mother. “Well done. Always said your soup was some good stuff.”

“Your phone keeps ringing, I just took it out of your room, as you were fast asleep and I didn’t want it to wake you.” Her mother hands her back her mobile.

“I’m sure it probably wasn’t important.” Ridley shrugs and scrolls down through the missed calls, the log shows numbers that get longer and more foreign with each hour. There are numerous text messages too.

Ridley, I’m now in Panama. It’s quite hot here.

2 hours later:The Spanish is confusing me, amigo.

7 hours later:Could you send me sun cream?

7 hours and 2 minutes: “Rid, how do you cure burns?

8 hours later:Slowly rising up the ranks, turns out one of the main mob bosses likes Lord of the Rings too. Lots in common.

10 hours later:Am now his right hand man…woman. Thinking of getting a tattoo. Ideas?

12 hours later:It’s a bit loco here at the moment, we’ve decided to stage a break out. I told them all about that one episode of ‘Prison Break’, I watched. It seemed to give them all ideas.

15 hours later:Success! On the way home, can you pick me up from the airport? I’ll show you my new tattoo! Arriving at 5.”

Ridley sighs and glances at the clock, it’s 4.30. Lights from a camera flash blind her. The reporter has started taking pictures of her mother holding up a soup bowl and a spoon.

“I’m going to go change. Gotta pick up Latimer.” Ridley turns to go climb back up the stairs and texts: “Fine. Going to be a little late though.

She gets an immediate reply.

No problem. BTW I’ve brought friends. See you in a bit 🙂

“Have fun!” Her mother calls.

“Depends on your definition.” Ridley mutters.

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And that, my friends, is how it all went down, in my head. Haha. Who knows what happens when I got to that airport. I was probably insanely jealous of Latimer’s great tan and cool tattoo (or horrific sun burn and hodge-podge black smudge?) Either way, fun times!

Need more sleep I think! 🙂

Thanks to freedigitalphotos.com for my pictures (except the TCP one,that’s all mine)